Eavesdropping on a woman après ski at The George in Vail where two friends ordered $4.50 happy-hour dirty martinis. The bartender asked: “Do you want it Miley style? It’s filthy!”

Eavesdropping on a woman on Facebook talking about her daughter: “Eliza fell and scraped her knee. As I cuddled her, I asked if she wanted some ice to help the pain. With giant tears rolling down her cheeks she said, ‘No, I want prosciutto.’ We are definitely raising a good little Italian.”

Eavesdropping on a man: “I put vodka in my windshield washer tank. Now I know it won’t freeze. LOL. I’ll just hold a martini glass with my sunroof open while I spray my windows.”

Eavesdropping on a woman after the Broncos game: “I thought I would have to chew through my Shellac nails, but thank goodness that didn’t happen!”

Eavesdropping on a man: “One night of dancing at my age, and now I’ve got to file for Twerkman’s comp benefits.”

Eavesdropping on David Wells’ Facebook page: “My next child born is going to be named ‘Omaha Hurry Hurry Smokey Left’  Wells.”

Eavesdropping on Andrew Hudson’s Facebook page: “New job on AH jobs list! Governor, state of New Jersey.”

Eavesdropping on a man: “I put vodka in my windshield washer tank. Now I know it won’t freeze. I’ll just hold a martini glass with my sunroof open while I spray my windows.”

Eavesdropping on a man in Aspen: “It’s so cold that you have to open the ‘fridge to heat the house.”

Yeah, it’s dang cold!